Monday, March 13, 2017

A Little More About Me and Life (Again)

Growing up I was always shy and timid, I still am at some point. More likely reserved. But there's always an invisible raised eyebrow and an unseen wall that exists in the back of my head. I like to keep it cool and laid-back. But I don't give retorts in a laid-back manner, I kill it swiftly or just ignore it depending on my mood.

When I was young I was forced to play gender roles that I don't really like.
You are this so you should carry that.
You are that so you must grow up to be that.
This is the toy for you, not the other one.
Why are people so hellbent on my fucking gender business?

Even today, People tell me not to do this or that because I am of a certain gender.
Well, fuck you. This is my fucking body. I am the one that has to live with it and not you.

And with those lines people have misunderstood me yet again, Perceiving me as to be already angry.
But in fact, I am just stating facts.
And no, I just don't have time for bullshit.

I am so sick of ignorant and close-minded people who know nothing of my journey.
They are so stuck up with their mundane and traditional, old ways that they forget to live a little and learn how to respect another person's way of living.

And this is an old story and I have moved on. But it is fun to mention such things.
Sometimes you remember insignificant things being told about you.
And as human beings we take emotion as a good catalyst for recording memories.

I mean, someone has already called me immoral. And he is gay. Like WTF right?
I mean, I am not the one chasing after a guy and then signs up for a religious group.
Such an effin' hypocrite.

Anyway, Enough about retards. lol.

Now I am just living a life that I hope in the future would be worth it. If not, well, We could always find a reason that would make us feel better, or worst case brainwash ourselves that our life is good. Not to be a pessimist But I am not.
I just like shifting from polar perspectives. It does sound pessimistic because the easy and great things are always predictable. When you compare the ending of some movie, the happy ending always goes like; They got married, or they lived happily after, or he survived and became successful.

The bad stuff is more complicated, sophisticated and artistic for me, Compared to the good stuff, Like some plot twist that leaves the viewers hanging and feeling just a little bit empty or manipulated in a bad way, Or be forced into a situation that leaves the main character helpless.
We complain a lot because we don't like those things and most of them are not even the worst.
But because we leave anything below the good - as bad.  We can't take mediocrity.

That is the beauty of living in this world. A world where there's a variety of opinion. Although results mostly only matter, But because there's a variety of opinion, the opinion could trump a bad result.

When we only see what we want to see,It is how we think that makes us. It changes everything.

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